Fast, but not too fast

(Before I begin, if you're out there, Russian reader, das vidanya from India!)


The other day I went to CMC (Christian Medical College) Hospital to inquire about getting some "medical tourism" work done (don't worry, I will not come back with a new nose or fewer chins). The medical tourism industry is supposedly huge in India. Max Hospital group in Delhi even has a separate check-in counter for international visitors. According to one source, medical tourism in India will be a $3 billion industry by 2015. 


But that's not really the purpose of this story.  The point is to illustrate the importance of family life in India. 


While being led around the many buildings that make up CMC, my friend was able to whisk me past the numerous guards stationed at hospital entrances very easily with her employee pass. She explained that the hospital often requires visitors to have a pass for entry. When someone is ill, so many family members try to visit them that the hospital becomes overcrowded with well-wishers. If someone's entire clan (Imagine if Bin Land had made it to the hospital. He could have filled a whole wing with his upmteen wives and kids.) tries to show up at once, then they have to share passes so only a small number will be allowed in the room at the same time. 


With the newspapers filled with the growth of India's economy and the IT sector and working women, it is good to know that family is still a strong part of the culture here. Generally speaking, we have more freedom in the U.S. and fewer familial duties. But, as I've mentioned before on this blog, too much freedom sometimes translates into not being able to count on others.


And speaking of freedom, I'd like to talk about Freedom, Jonathan Franzen's latest book. Instead of reading it, I took advantage of a free 14-day trial subscription to audible.com available to This American Life podcast listeners. After getting over a few grating qualities of the characters, namely Patty, and the reader's voice, I found it to be a totally engrossing and spectacular book. Whatever small little fantasies I held about possibly writing a book someday (I have had the first line of a book in my head for over ten years now, but that is as far as I've gotten), I have put to a deep sleep.  Let me leaving the novel-writing to those with something to say. 

Thomas Jefferson and Monticello

I was seeking a favor. This favor would involve going to my apartment in Fort Greene, Brooklyn and exchanging keys for a deposit with my subletter. One sister - working; a Brooklyn friend - running a race; another Brooklyn friend - too overwhelmed with finding a new roommate and being broke. Who to turn to?  


I relayed this chain of events to a good friend here in India, and he was dismayed. How could you be too busy??  What is wrong with your culture. In India, you see, if someone needs something, they ask and they shall have. So if your cousin's cousin's cousin calls and needs you to run across town to meet X (because business here is done in person; try and call someone and see what kind of response you get: "Uh, please come in and we can discuss this further.") and then bring it to Y who will send it to Z, then, A) you can say yes B)  you can say yes, or C) you can say yes.  So you see, you have some options.


On the flipside, though, we Americans have some flexibility to say no once in a while.  But can we rely on people as much? So you take the good with the bad. US: independence; and sometimes too much independence.  India: you can depend on others; or, time management issues. 


All of this is to just point out the differences in culture. I completely understood that some of my friends and family had prior commitments and couldn't attend to my every need - my Indian friend did not get this so much. In the end, one of my sister's was able to go and thankfully spotted the deposit for me because the subletters check had not yet arrived!  

You must feed the ants

It has been a while since I wanted to burst out laughing, impolitely, in someone's face. But that is what nearly happened when I consulted an astrologist and he said, very seriously, "You must feed the ants." The backstory is that my friend had some burning questions she wanted answered, so when an astrologist came to her business, she took it as a sign that she should visit this wise, knowing man (with a computer program) and find some answers. I decided to tag along, because when else was I going to go to a "legitimate" astrologist for $3?


When I entered the room, Sukhminder, who is also a t.v. newscaster (somehow this makes complete sense), sat calmly at his desk, surrounded by stones, a slightly eery picture of his deceased mother and a large poster of the planets at his back. Every finger was adorned with a ring presumed to hold some significance, and his neck cradled several golden chain necklaces with stones embedded in them. An orange smudge dotted his forehead and when he leaned over, he provided a clear view of his receding hairline.


I then gave Sukhminder my name, date of birth, place of birth and approximate time of birth and he entered this all into his computer. There was no smoke or wizadry, just a Dell laptop and letterhead with Sukhminder's black and white photo on the top, in which he's wearing sunglasses that make him look like he missed the Men in Black casting call. 


There's some good news and bad news. The bad news is that I will encounter a lot of expenditures until May 12, 2011. To counter this, I should feed the ants til choti (some mixture of something). And I should not feed the dozens of ants that march regularly across my kitchen counter, but I should go to a nearby tree and feed these ants. Apparently, my relationships are supposed to be giving me difficulty right now. This will all improve on August 8, 2011. But in the meantime, I can feed black grams to the poor people every Saturday. And to improve my work situation, I can feed biscuits to two dogs a day. Lastly, I should feed the birds a mixture of corn, barley, rice and green pulses, but I might skip this one because I can't remember what it is for. Maybe it's for my marriage...which is supposed to happen between May 9, 2012 and October 9, 2013...so if you're single, watch out, because I may be on the prowl.

Will you accept a little rambling?

Having been quite some time since I posted, I'm finding it difficult to jump back into this here blogging world. So, if you'll pardon the randomness of it, I'm just going to spout off a few things that have come to mind recently.


1) People are different. No matter how much we want to say that we're all the same, culture plays an obviously huge role in our lives and shapes us forever. Take for instance the simple appliance the refrigerator. While I, and many other Americans, probably consider this a vital appliance, I'm not sure most Indians feel the same way. Sure, you can go into most middle class and up homes in Mumbai, Delhi and Ludhiana and find a fridge. But go to the villages or to poorer homes, and these families will likely have a t.v. before they have a fridge.  In fact, they may even have satellite t.v. before they have a fridge. And open a fridge in an Indian's home, and what will you find?  Not much.  Most likely it will be nearly empty. Once I caught my maid snuffing out the contents of my fridge and showing her curious sister how full it was. I am one person and my fridge is stuffed. It's just how I was raised and how I cook. I make leftovers; I change my meals frequently; I like to have things on hand for when I want a snack; and I like my snacks cold!  


2) We are changing seasons here in Punjab. I went from a simple sheet on the bed in August to using two quilts and a heater in December, and now I'm back to just the sheet.  Pretty soon I hope to install an a/c so I don't melt when temps hit the 100's and the humidity approaches saturation levels.


3) I got an extension! The good people at Fulbright are allowing me to stay an extra three months. Hence the need for an a/c. My return to NYC in August will be a shocker, but now I have a few more months to prepare and also find a job. If you're hiring, let me know!


4) I've decided to consult an astrologer. They're quite common here - people often make major decisions based on what their astrologer tells them. I won't put that much emphasis on his predictions and am using it more for fun.  Who knows?!


5) I am humbled. I was in Goa recently for the Fulbright conference. And if my fellow Fulbrighters are any indication of the stock of young people about to emerge into the workforce, America will be a-okay.  It's amazing what some 22 year olds are doing with their life. Some of these scholars will go on to some of the best medical schools in the US; jobs at Google and prestigious firms and PhD's at MIT. I was impressed and awed. It was great.

Karnataka, my new favorite Indian state

Hampi

Desperately trying to get a bottle of wine open

Eating cheese and baguette and I am so happy

Cute and geeky little train museum in Mysore

Mysore Palace

Fancy hotel near Mysore

Cute little boy who swore he was going to school and just helping
out that day. Here you see him making inscence sticks. 

Sushi in Bengaluru. I was in heaven. 

My huge sundae that I unchristianly-like
did not share with anyone.

Some things give you pause

Every now and then I'm reminded of the stark contrasts that surround me. Less than an hour ago I returned from buying chicken. Seems innocuous enough, right? Except this chicken is going to feed my kitten. Still unclear? Let me paint the picture for you: Girl negotiates price of Rs 40 ($0.90) for a return trip on a rickshaw. Girl boards rickshaw and travels to chicken shop. On the way, girl is reminded that she has been craving a glass of wine, so girl asks the bicyclist to stop at the liquor shop on the way (girl speaks only a little Hindi, so she says, "Here, here, here," indicating to the driver he should stop, which puts them near the liquor shop.). She buys a bottle of wine for Rs 700 ($15.55 - more than she would might spend in NY on a bottle, but right now, who cares?), and outside she gets a request for money by a mother who could not have been older than 16 and who was cradling the tiniest, most adorable newborn. She debates the pros and cons of giving the woman some money and this time, opts to apologize and keep moving. They proceed to the chicken shop to buy chicken pieces - Rs 80 ($1.78) for two legs, two wings and a breast (chicken is relatively more expensive here than in the US; go subsidies!). But at the chicken shop something occurs to her. It came to her in the form of a little flick of her brain: How many Indians cannot afford chicken for their families - maybe 60% of them?  And she's buying it for her kitten! Oh, the world is a strange, confusing and difficult place. 

They're just like us

If you've traveled to India, you've probably experienced the phenomenon of being stared at. It's not an accusatory stare, or one of malice; it's a stare of extreme curiosity mixed with pleasure and often, if the stare-er is under 15, the giggles. Which got me to thinking about the US Weekly section called, Stars: They're Just Like Us! Before you go a gettin all holier than thou, no, I don't read this magazine regularly; but yes, I have been known to peruse it on occasion, such as when waiting on an interminable line at Duane Reade. At any rate, hopefully this does not come across the wrong way, but when I'm getting stared at here, I kind of feel like one of those stars!  I mean, it makes sense that maybe they're thinking, "Hey, that foreigner, she scratches her nose...just like us! Hey, that foreigner, she crosses the street...just like us!"


The other week I had an annoying layover in Delhi. I arrived on the train at 4:30 AM and had to wait until 7:20 AM to board my next train at a different train station. So my friend and I wiled away 2 hours at the Delhi train station waiting for the Metro to open. I had yet to brush my teeth, so decided that I would take a cue from my fellow Indians who are rarely shy about public grooming, bathing and toileting, or really anything, and just brush in the small outdoor cafe where we were waiting.  This should attract more staring, right? Well, given that I was already being stared at, and I'm always being stared at, I decided that little more could come of this. And I was right. Was that anticlimactic (Should hit the delete button?)? Well, you get the point.